Unrushing

I’ve picked up yoga again. Not for the first time, this is actually round two, and I’m hoping this time it actually sticks. 

I tried it years ago and loved it immediately. The slowness of it, the focus, the way an hour on the mat could quiet my head down in a way not much else did. But somehow it never became a habit. Life got in the way or I got in the way, and it just faded out without me really deciding to stop. 

For a while after that I was working out a lot more, lifting, doing the usual gym routine. It was fine. I got stronger and I don’t regret the time. But I never really identified with gym culture. The mirrors, the noise, the whole atmosphere of it never felt like mine. I was going through the motions of a workout that worked for other people more than it worked for me. 

So I’m back on the mat. Same reasons as before, the slowness, the focus, the way it makes me feel more like myself than pushing weight ever did. The difference this time is I actually want it to stay. Not as a phase I circle back to every few years, but as something that’s just part of how I move through a week. 

We’ll see. I’ve said that before too. But it feels different this time, and that’s worth writing down.